蜜芽传媒

This week saw the publication of Arundhati Roy鈥檚 new book. Described as a 鈥榤emoir like no other鈥� 鈥楳other Mary Comes to Me鈥� details the writer鈥檚 complicated relationship with her mother.

An educator and women鈥檚 rights activist, Mary Roy broke with the conventions of what was expected of her. In 1986, for example, she won a lawsuit in Kerala which gave Syrian Christian women in the area, the same rights to inherit their ancestral property as their male siblings.
Arundhati Roy describes how in the conservative South Indian town in which she was raised, her mother 鈥渃onducted herself with the edginess of a gangster鈥� when in those days women were 鈥渙nly allowed the option of cloying virtue 鈥� or its affectation鈥�.
Now here鈥檚 where Mary Roy reminds me of another Mother Mary: Jesus鈥檚 mother.

That might come as a surprise to you, but she was also complex and powerful. She also challenged the status quo. Mary of Nazareth lives in the public imagination in the form of a doting, beautiful, passive and virtuous receptacle of societal ideals about what a woman and a mother should be like.
Through thousands of Western European images Mary is instantly recognisable; an iconic portrayal of perfection. But to me the real Mary, described in scripture, was far more interesting than the one-dimensional portrayals of her we鈥檝e come to know.

This Mary faced the isolation and taboo of being pregnant and unmarried, spoke 鈥� or sang 鈥� of the powerful being torn down from their thrones, and watched her son become an enemy of the state, eventually bearing witness to his brutal murder.

Mary鈥檚 story didn鈥檛 end with picturesque and softly-lit nativity scenes, but she was present throughout Jesus鈥檚 ministry and beyond. And yet so often we see her caricatured as a vacant 鈥� yet holy 鈥� mother.

In our polarised society, we can make snap judgments about people based on what we think they are like 鈥� because of their gender, race, sexuality, or political affiliation. But no one is just one story. Arundhati Roy writes of her mother that she was 鈥渘ever a coherent, tidy character鈥�. Are any of us?
Roy describes too how her mother shaped her as a writer. As is the case for most of us, our mothers鈥� influences leave marks on the pages of our lives.
Dr Rowan Williams believes Mary shaped how her son saw the world. 鈥淢ary,鈥� he said, 鈥渢eaches Jesus humanity鈥�.

Though many might consider the Christian story simplistic and saccharine, I鈥檓 continually surprised by the way some of the Bible鈥檚 heroes 鈥� from Abraham to David to St Paul and to Mary 鈥� were, like Arundhati Roy鈥檚 mother, and just like every one of us, messy and complicated, and beautiful.

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